The Things I Deal With
by chariots99
Summary: Drabbles! 100 words of awesomeness! NOW: Tom will NEVER be hired to work for MI6, not as long as Blunt is Director. And this is why.
1. Water to H2SO4

_So, I've just found out what a drabble was! Apparently, it's a story with only 100 words! So of course, I had to take up the challenge ;) Wait...do ANs count? _

_In case you were wondering; no, this will NOT use OCs from my series. This is completely and utterly irrelevant stuff!_

_Don't own. Will never own._

_**Title:**__ Water to H2SO4_

_**Summary**__: What happens when you add water to sulphuric acid? Basic chemistry, my dear readers._

.

Alex paces the room. Again. And again.

He's doing his best to ignore the room's other occupant, the one who _still_ has that smirk on his face.

Finally, Alex sighs, before turning to face him: "You, Tom Harris, are an utter pain in the ass. It's amazing that I'm still sane after all these years."

"What?" Tom says; he widens his eyes, going for the innocent look. Not working.

"I cannot _believe_ that I'm in trouble because _you_ exploded the chemistry classroom!" Alex hissed, as the principal opens his door and shouts for the boys. And he sounds _really_ angry.


	2. Royal Wedding Special

Thanks for all the amazingly awesome reviews!

**Title**: Royal Wedding Special!

**Summary**: When Prince William and the beautiful Kate Middleton get married, guess which unhappy man is signed up for protection detail?

AN – I have to share a little song from **MsBookworm23**! It goes like this: "Poor little [insert name here], dead and gone, her face will see no more, for what she thought was H20 was H2S04." Isn't it wonderful?

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Wolf hated protection detail.

All he had to do was stand and look imposing so that no-one decided to try and get close to whoever it was. As if he didn't do that already!

Normally, it was fine. People usually kept away from him as a safety precaution.

But when the new Duke and Duchess of Cambridge were passing behind him, not even his glare was keeping the spectators contained!

Then he spotted something that made it even worse.

A very familiar, blonde haired boy, pointing him out to a friend, doubled over, and _laughing!_

Wolf _really_ hated protection detail.

.

_Aww...poor Wolf...hahahah_

_And yes, for those wondering, the friend was Tom._

**PLEASE REVIEW!**

**Trivia**: This came about because today, for whatever reason, my friends and I were talking about the Royal Wedding (Kate's dress was beautiful!). Then, one of my friends said "Gosh, I feel so sorry for the people who had to guard them! Worst job ever during a wedding!"...this was the result ;)


	3. Punishment

**Title: **Punishment

**Summary:** How do you punish your best friend?

.

"Alex? I'd like to come out now."

Being the amazingly awesome spy that he was, Alex could deal with a many things. Bombings, escaping from a burning building, attempted assassinations, his best friend exploding the chemistry classroom...

"Hm, let me think," Alex said mockingly. "No."

The one thing he couldn't deal with was being woken up, before dawn, on his day off, by his idiot-of-a-best-friend blasting an air horn next to his ear.

"But Alex – it's dark, and crampy, and really, _really_ _smelly_!"

So Alex did what any normal person would've done; he shut said best friend into his closet.

.

**REVIEW!**

_Yes, I admit that I have been locked in my friend's wardrobe once...not a pleasant experience..._


	4. Corruption

**Title: **Corruption

**Summary**: Because when you've been blackmailed so many times, something's bound to give.

**Warning**: Dark Alex...

.

Brown on brown; bad on good.

Gazes locked. Ragged breathing. Waiting. Alone in the dead field.

"_Traitor_." Ben choked on the words. "What have they done to you?"

He spoke, amused. "Scorpia? They helped me put my life together, after MI6 destroyed it and left me all alone. Defenceless. Now leave. Or I'll kill you too."

"In cold blood?" Ben asked grimly, shaking his head "You're not that far gone Alex. No, you can't be."

Alex's lips twisted, and he chuckled. "You'd like to believe that, wouldn't you?"

A sudden blur; an echoing bang.

Brown on brown; corruption on blankness.

.

_Ooooh, Alex turned dark!_

**PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW!**_ If you've got any prompts, I'd love to hear them!_


	5. To Be Nice

1343 hits and counting...holy crap...

**Title: **To Be Nice

**Summary**: Alan Blunt was only trying to be nice. Who would've thought that would get him into so much strife?

.

It starts with the Prime Minister demanding Alan Blunt be nicer to their nation's best spy. It ends with Alan Blunt tied in his chair, a gun pointed unwaveringly at his head, his office flocked with guards giving him suspicious looks.

"I'm telling you, this isn't him," Alex said.

"He answered all the questions correctly," Mrs Jones said.

"Then they tortured answers out of him!" Alex shouted. "For God's sake, he _asked_ me, _politely_, if I wanted to go on a mission!"

"I was trying to be _nice_!" Blunt sighed, exasperated.

"See what I mean?" Alex roared, cocking the gun.

.

**HAHAHAHA! PLEASE REVIEW! THANKS TO ALL REIVEWERS!**_ If you've got any prompts, I'd love to hear them!_


	6. Drunk

**Title: **Drunk

**Summary:** "You were right, I shouldn't have done it, I'm so sorry, but I did, and I really shouldn't've."

**Interesting Trivia**: The idea for this drabble came from a real life scenario with my friends...

.

"Jack! Open the – oh thank God!" Alex panted, "You were right, I shouldn't have done it, I'm so sorry, but I did, and I really shouldn't've –"

"Woah, breathe Alex!" Jack commanded, "Now, what's wrong?"

"I got Tom drunk."

"Oh no," she groaned, as Alex stepped aside.

Tom was standing behind Alex, muttering incoherently to himself. When he noticed Jack, his expression lit up.

"Jack!" He exclaimed. "Hahaha, get it? 'Jack'! It's a guy's name! But you're a girl! Hahaha...'Jack'."

And so saying, he promptly passed out at their feet.

Jack turned to Alex. "I hope you've learnt your lesson."

.

**PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW!**_ If you've got any prompts, I'd love to hear them!_


	7. Compromise

**Title**: Compromise

**Prompt: **"_Alex running away from bad guy when he sees window of a flat open. Jumps through does a roll and comes face to face with one of k unit in an embarrassing position_" – **the kraken is my pet**

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Ducking, weaving, sprinting.

Gunshots.

Heavy panting.

In short, basically what Alex did at the end of every mission.

They were closing in. If he didn't get out of the way, he would most certainly be dead. He looked around for an escape.

_There!_

The window to the ground-level apartment was open. Perfect!

Alex dived, rolling in just as more bullets flew past.

He sighed, relieved, before looking up. His jaw dropped upon seeing Snake. And his half-nakedness. And the three women screaming in fright on the bed.

"It's not what you think!"

The next shot almost takes his head off.

.

Crack much? Hehehe...**REVIEW!**


	8. Ringtones

_**Title:**__ Ringtones_

_**Summary**__: Okay, that was really the last straw. The next time he saw Tom, Alex was going to make sure the boy never saw the light again._

_._

It happened first in English. Halfway through the teacher's explanation of imagery:

"_I can't be tamed! I can't be blamed!"_

And then, while they're math teacher was shouting himself blue about them being a bunch of failures:

"_So I put my hands up, to playing my song, know I'm gonna be okay."_

But the final straw was during science:

"_You get the best of both worlds –_"

Alex's phone went spinning across the classroom, shattering upon impact with the wall.

At the end of the day, when Alex caught up with Tom, he hissed only three words:

"You. Are. Dead."

.

_Ahahahahahaha! Poor Alex!_

**Please leave a REVIEW!**_ I'd love to hear any prompts too!_

**Trivia**: I did this to my friend. It's a sure-fire way to make sure they don't talk to you for the next decade-and-a-half.


	9. Never Underestimate Me

**Title: **Never Underestimate Me

**Summary**: Alex, you ain't the only dangerous one in the Rider household...

.

He'd told her to hide. Run. Call the police. Stay safe. Let him handle the intruders, the _possible_ assassins, alone. Because, if anything happened to her, it would kill him more surely than a bullet...and he'd already been there.

She'd retorted: "Do you really think I'm that useless, Alex?"

_Not usually. But against four armed possible assassins, with no training in self defence...yes._

But he'd answered in the negative.

And now, as he watched Jack wield the saucepan with a deadly grace, her feet set firmly, two intruders already knocked out, Alex was sure-as-hell glad he'd kept his mouth shut.

.

_Oh yeah, go Jack!_

**PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW!**_ If you've got any prompts, I'd love to hear them!_


	10. Madness

**Title**: Madness

**Prompt**:"_I could actually imagine a reverse situation of 'Corruption' in which Ben holds the advantage over Alex and decides not to kill him, making him corrupted as well, in a way, for letting a criminal escape._" – **speechbubble**

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Brown on brown; good on bad.

Eyes narrowed. Waiting. Alone in the bare room.

"I'm not going to kill you, Alex."

The words were cold. The man he'd once known, gone.

"What happened to you?" Alex whispered, horrified. This wasn't how it was supposed to turn out.

Ben just smirked. "Come with me. You'll do no good here."

Alex shook his head, frozen.

Ben just shrugged. "Suit yourself."

Alex watched as the man walked away. Alex watched as he _let_ the man walk away.

Before he left, Ben turned. Their gazes locked once more.

Brown on brown; unfeeling on madness.

.

Hm...don't know how that turned out...**REVEIW!**


	11. SPIDER!

**Title**: SPIDER!

**Summary**: You never know. Really. You just never know what people are afraid of.

Crack.

.

At the terrified shout, Jack burst into the room, convinced that someone was trying to kidnap/torture/kill Alex. Well, those were the usual choices.

However, she did not expect to see the infallible spy cowering on top of his chair.

"Alex?"

Alex turned desperate eyes on her.

"Spider," he whispered.

"Ah. I see." Well, no, she did not see.

"Get rid of it, please?"

"Sure thing."

Obligingly, she got down to locate the spider.

Then, Jack did something very mean. She looked back up with a frown.

"It's not here – Alex, don't move."

"W-why?"

"It's on your head."

The result was _spectacular_.

.

Yep...probably beyond crack. **REVEIW!**


	12. Spidey senses

**Title**: Spidey-Senses

**Summary:** Somehow, Tom had managed to associate Spiderman with Spy...

So, continuing on with the spider thread of thought...

.

The first time it happened, Alex waved it off as being part of one of Tom's mood swings.

The second time it happened, Alex was a little worried that the phase hadn't yet passed.

The third time it happened, Alex started to get a little bit annoyed. Just a tad.

The fourth time it happened, Alex was close to exploding at his friend.

Which was why, when he next saw Tom, Alex shouted: "No, my spidey-senses are _not _tingling!"

Tom just gave him a strange look. "Jeez, what's your problem? I just wanted to know if you got the homework..."

.

_Oh, poor Alex!_

**Please leave a REVIEW!** Any prompts you want to leave will also be considered ;)


	13. Till the End

**Title: **'Till The End

**Summary**: Because in the end, it's your loved ones you'd protect first.

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Alex always knew, in his heart of hearts, that his stubbornness would be his downfall.

_Pain...blood...so much blood._

The questions kept coming. The _pain_ kept coming. They expected him to break. _He _expected him to break. But in the end, it wasn't loyalty to MI6 that kept his mouth shut. It wasn't even loyalty to his country.

_You will not bend me. I can't break. I _won't_ break. I refuse to shatter their trust._

It was to Jack.

Tom.

Ben.

The ones who'd stood by him no matter what.

The ones who'd promised to always be there.

'_Till the end._

.

_Wow, I've got the chills writing this..._

_**PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW!**__ If you've got any prompts, I'd love to hear them!_


	14. The Beauty of the World

**Title** – The Beauty of the World

**Summary** – When you're drowning in a pool of hurt and despair, it's so easy to lose yourself. But sometimes, even the tiny, seemingly insignificant things are enough to remind you of what you're fighting for.

**Prompt**: "Butterflies, cos i saw a really pretty cream and orange one today =)" – **MsBookworm23**

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Charred and burnt.

Thick billowings of smoke.

That was all that remained of the abandoned building. And any would-be survivors trapped inside.

Then, a figure stumbled out.

Coughing, choking, gasping.

Singed hair, soot covered skin; somehow Alex Rider had survived. Again.

The man collapsed amongst the bleak, burnt-out rubble. Around him littered the smell of death and destruction, the constant reminder of what he had done. Alex felt like he was going to puke.

An unexpectedly cheerful flash of orange.

He turned, confused.

A butterfly fluttered past, dancing around Alex, restoring hope within his soul once more.

And Alex smiled.

.

_Hm...not entirely sure about that one..._

**REVIEW!**


	15. Wikipedia

_Been a while? I think so. But unfortunately, my ever-loving sis used up all the internet data...so I pretty much had no internet access. I know. Pity me._

**Title** – Wikipedia

**Summary** – There are some things in life that are priceless...for everything philosophy, there's Wikipedia.

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"Did you know that, no matter what topic you start off with on Wikipedia, you will always end up at 'philosophy'?"

"Huh?" Alex looked up, blinking.

"Yeah! If you always click the first link, but not the pronunciations or things in brackets, you will always reach 'philosophy'!" Tom said excitedly, pushing his laptop towards Alex. "Go on! Start with...Miley Cyrus!"

"...Okay..." Alex frowned, deciding to humour his friend.

Twenty one pages later, he'd arrived at 'philosophy'.

Alex's mouth dropped open, with Tom chuckling triumphantly in the background.

Two hours later, when Jack came in, the boys were still clicking away...

.

_Trivia_ –_ Yes, this does work! How do I know? Well, this is how I spent my lecture time..._

_**REVIEW!**_


	16. Fire

**Title**: Fire

**Summary**: Okay, that was the last time he was letting Tom anywhere near matches again...

.

"Tom."

"Yes?"

"I'm on fire." Surprisingly, Alex's voice was very calm.

"I can see that."

"You set me on fire."

"Well, not on purpose," Tom said defensively, trying to light up another match.

"But you did," Alex said, deadpanned.

"It is kinda your own fault," Tom said. "You wouldn't be on fire if you weren't there."

A pause followed in which Alex contemplated his friend's IQ.

"Are you going to do anything about it?" He asked instead.

Tom shrugged. "Putting out fires isn't nearly as fun."

Alex sighed.

_Note to self; report Tom to MI6 as possible future serial arsonist. _

.

I don't know where that came from...

**REVIEW! **And don't worry, Alex made it out fine ;)


	17. In a Different World

**Title**: In a Different World...

**Summary**: Backed into a corner, Alex Rider is about to get help from a very unexpected source...

**Prompt**: "Bring back Dessi! Well, not for the whole thing, obviously, but like, have a cameo...does that make sense?" – **Lovely Dovely**

**AN**: I promised myself that this would be unrelated to my AR series, but I couldn't resist this prompt! By the way, this is like an AU of my AU...yeah, confused? Me too. Let's just move on...

.

Crystal blue eyes.

_Alex ran for his life, dodging, ducking, weaving, trying to avoid the rain of bullets taking chunks out of neighbouring walls._

Short blonde hair.

_They'd backed him into a corner. So he did the last thing they expected; fought back._

A quirked eyebrow.

_Two against one. And Alex was unarmed. Oh crap._

An amused smile.

_Gunshots suddenly echoed down the alley, killing one man. Alex used the moment to knock out the other._

She stood from her vantage point, sniper slung across her back.

"Nice working with you!" She called, before leaving Alex in the alley below.

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Hehe, hoped you liked it! **REVIEW!**

**Trivia**: Not once in that entire drabble did I mention Dessi's name...I reckon that's some sort of record, don't you?


	18. Again? Really?

**Title**: Again? Really?

**Summary**: Tom's gotten himself locked in the closet. Again. You'd think he's learnt the lesson the first time 'round...

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"You can't lock me in your closet every time I upset you."

"Wanna bet?" Alex asked idly, finishing the equation.

"...No, not really..."

Silence. Alex moved on to physics, trying to understand the overly-complicated diagram he'd drawn.

"I just...thought it would be fun," came Tom's muffled and resigned explanation.

"Oh?" Alex said, his tone indifferent.

"...Yeah...I'm sorry."

"I know," Alex sang, turning the page.

"I should've learnt my lesson the last time," Tom continued, "I promise I'll never add water to sulphuric acid again."

"That's good," Alex commented.

"...So, are you going to let me out?" Tom asked hopefully.

"Nope."

.

Hehehe...Oh, I love friendly fluffy stories! It's so different to what I normally write..._**PLEASE REVIEW!**_


	19. Reunited

**Title**: Reunited

**Summary:** 'Till death do us part? For spies, it's the other way 'round.

Not really a prompt...more like a request from someone who wanted something chilling. I'm really sorry, but I somehow managed to delete all the reviews from my inbox, so I don't know who you are...my bad...

Oh, and someone (I'm pretty sure it was you, **MsBookWorm23**, but feel free to correct me if I'm wrong) who asked who Dessi was. Well, she's an OC from my 'main' Alex Rider series, which consists of...four stories I think, and is awaiting the fifth. So yeah, hope that answers your question!

And now, onto the story ;)

.

No-one ever came to this part of the cemetery.

Because, even though these people gave up their lives for their country, no-one would ever remember them.

Most had no family, not wanting to risk another life with their own.

For others, their family had been taken out with them, despite their best efforts to shield them from this world.

A new grave was added that day. A new name to the nameless list.

_Alex J Rider_.

His grave lay between two others, _John Rider_ and _Helen Rider_, and opposite another, _Ian Rider_.

Only in death could this family be reunited.

.

_Well, that was depressing._

**Please REVIEW!**


	20. Cooking skills, or lack thereof

**Title** – Cooking Skills; or lack thereof

**Summary** – Alex, Alex, Alex. There are some things in life that even _you_ aren't good at. So please, take your multi-talented self and get the hell out of the kitchen...

**Prompt: **"Alex cooking a meal"** – Another Harry potter fan **(it's really about time I did one for you; I swear, you're like my most loyal reviewer ever! xox)

OMG! OVER 100 REVIEWS ALREADY! THANK YOU ALL SOOOOOOO MUCH!

.

"Ma'am, is everyone out of the house?" The fireman shouted.

Jack nodded shakily. "Yeah."

Around them, red and blue lights lit up the scene, courtesy of the three fire-trucks. Firemen ran in every direction. The neighbours had been evacuated, and were gathered 'round watching.

It was a picture perfect definition of the word 'chaos'.

The firemen charged in bravely, and perhaps foolishly. Ten long minutes passed, before the all clear was given.

Jack turned to the boy wrapped in her arms.

"Alright Alex, what have you learnt tonight?"

Alex Rider, teenage spy extraordinaire, sighed. "I mustn't cook without adult supervision."

.

_Hehehe...__**REVIEW!**_

_**Trivia**__: Hm...there seems to be a rather persistent 'fire' theme going on...shall I continue this trend?_


	21. Undercover Angel

**Title** – Undercover angels

**Summary** – Alex had fought against this cover, and fought it hard. But then, he'd given it more thought and changed his mind. After all, at the end of the day, who was he to say 'no' to a little more blackmail?

**Prompt**: 'Pretty' – **speechbubble **

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They were on stakeout at the bar. Ben was rather happy; he'd been paired back with K-unit again. However, only he knew the full undercover details.

Which was why this was such an awkward position.

"Can I get you anything else?" The pretty waitress asked.

Ben was the only who cringed. The rest of his unit were already smitten.

"Your number would be nice," Eagle grinned.

The waitress walked away with a laugh.

Ben just groaned.

Judging from the smirk that was now adorning the 'waitress's' face, there was going to be plenty of blackmail material on K-Unit later on.

.

_Hehehehe...don't know if anyone picked up on who the waitress was?_

_**Please REVIEW!**__ If you've got any prompts, I'd love to hear them!_

_PS – yes, the waitress was Alex =)_


	22. Panic

**Title:** Panic

**Summary**: It's always bad when the words "Oh my God" come out of the mouth of the person you'd entrusted to cut your hair...

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"Oh my God!"

Those were not the three horrified words Alex wanted to hear at that particular moment in time. Especially since they were uttered by Jack...

Who had been cutting his hair.

"What? Jack? What?" Alex asked, panicked.

There was no answer.

"_Jack?_" Alex shouted, reaching up a hand and trying to feel where she'd gone wrong.

He spun around...but no-one was there.

Then Jack came sprinting into the room, scissors at the ready. She halted, looking around, confused. "Alex? What's wrong?"

"Why d'you run off?"

"Oh, I just remembered I left the oven on. The cake's burnt."

.

_Hahahahaha! Poor Alex and his panicked moment ;)_

**Leave a REVIEW!**

**Trivia:** This came to me while watching HP7 pt1, the scene in the tent where Hermione's cutting Harry's hair and then a brainwave comes to her. Hehe


	23. Chaos

**Title:** Chaos

**Summary**: Because sometimes, a little chaos goes a long way.

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They had been in primary school, and they'd been asked to write the word that best described them. The other children wrote words like 'happy' or 'pretty'. Tom wrote '_kaos_'. His reasoning?

His room was chaotic.

His mind was chaotic.

His parents were chaotic.

His life was chaotic.

Worried, his teacher had sent a letter home.

The chaos had always been treated like a curse.

But then, he'd met Alex Rider. And suddenly, chaos seemed like a gift. It became the one thing that could protect his friend's deadly secret.

Because no-one would believe him, not with all the chaos.

.

_Hm...don't actually know where that came from..._

**Please REVIEW!**


	24. Undercover Angel: Full Throttle

_Wow, I haven't updated in like forever! My apologies!_

**Title**: Undercover Angel – Full Throttle

**Summary**: Undercover Angel 2. Full Throttle, as in Eagle-is-in-a-mood-to-fully-throttle-Alex. Well, that's what happens when you hit on a guy-pretending-to-be-a-girl-but-not-in-a-weird-way-more-in-a-'if-I-don't-do-this-the-world-will-be-blown-up'-kinda-way...confused yet?

**Prompt:** "hahahaha i would LOVE to see a drabble of k-unit finding out who the waitress was, i would love it" – **ReillyScarecrowRocks**

.

"Well, that mission went without a hitch," Snake said, "Surprisingly."

"I know," Wolf growled, "Not even Eagle messed up, despite his incompetence."

"Come off it," Eagle scoffed, "You're just mad 'cause _I_ asked for her number first!"

Ben just sat in the corner.

"Oi, Fox," Snake called, "You alright?"

"Any moment now," Ben muttered darkly, "Wait for it..."

Suddenly the door burst wide open, revealing a smirking Alex Rider.

"Oh Eagle," he said a high voice, "I forgot to give you my number!"

"Oh hell no," Eagle groaned in realization.

"Oh hell yeah," Alex laughed, "You're _never_ living this down!"

.

Yay for revenge!

**REVIEW! **_And if you have any prompts, I'd love to hear them!_


	25. The Piercing

_**Another Harry Potter Fan**__asked when my story would come out. Well...let's set a tentative date for next week, 'kay? I'm just rather busy, have a wedding to attend, plus I've been neglecting study. So yeah, haven't gotten started yet ;)_

**Title:** The Piercing

**Summary**: Tom really couldn't care less about what Alex had been through.

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"Holy crap, what happened to you?" Tom asked, upon seeing his friend for the first time in over a month.

"Nice to see you too."

"Yeah, whatever," Tom waved aside, "Seriously man, what happened?"

"A bomb, several guns, a terrorist camp, enough poisonous gas to knock out a nation, a runaway bullet train...oh, and another person decided to try kill me," Alex listed, in a bored drone.

"And where, in between all that, did you find time to get your nose pierced?" Tom demanded.

Alex stared at his idiot-of-a best friend, eyebrow raised.

"Tom."

"...Shut up?"

"Got it in one."

.

_Hahaha, oh, I really love Tom. He's so random!_

_**Please leave a REVIEW!**__ If you've got any prompts, I'd love to hear them!_


	26. My Best Friend's Stupidity

**Title**: My Best Friend's Stupidity

**Summary**: Tom was a great friend. Loyal. Protective. But sometimes, there was just no arguing with his flawed sense of logic...

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"Alex, I'm bored!"

"Shut up and let me finish my essay."

Tom sighed. "You've been saying the same thing for the past hour!'

"So shut up and let me finish my essay."

There was a pause, filled only with the scribbling of pen on paper. Then –

"Let's play scissors, paper, rock!" Tom exclaimed, sticking out his hand.

Alex sighed. "You're not going to leave, are you?"

"Nope."

"Fine."

Tom chose rock.

Alex chose paper.

"Why do you always win?" Tom whined.

"Because you always choose rock."

"You always choose paper!"

Alex spluttered, choking. Then Tom asked –

"...best out of three?"

.

_Hehehehe. _**REVEW!**

Trivia: This is my little cousin's logic ;)


	27. The Secret's Out

_Sorry for the lack of updates (again) – I've been busy working on my latest full-length AR fic; check it out ;)_

**Title:** The Secret's Out

**Summary**: There were plenty of ways Alex had imagined his secret coming out. This was not one of them.

_I'd say that this was a little bit crack-ish..._

.

_Druggie._

_Freak._

_Gangster._

The whispers followed him around. All day. All night. For so many years. And he kept his head down, his mouth shut, and all the retorts bottled up within.

Until one day, he snapped.

Years worth of bottled up emotions exploded out. And so did that one secret that ruined his life...

He shut up, shocked.

Then one kid sighed, stood and shouted: "It's about time you told us!"

And the entire student population erupted into cheers for him, finally able to thank their hero.

Because, they already knew.

They just wanted him to tell them first.

.

_Hm...yeah...definitely crack._

**Anyway, REVEIW!**


	28. The One with Hunger

**Title** – The One with Hunger

**Summary** – Good friends don't steal your food. Best friends make sure you have none. Featuring the first (and probably last) appearance of James Hale.

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"Hey Alex, can I grab something to eat?"

"Help yourself," Alex said, flicking through the channels. "Oh, and get us something too."

A moment passed, in which James Hale could be heard rummaging around in his fridge and pantry. Then –

"Alex, there's no food here."

"What? I just restocked yesterday!"

"Oh yeah, I've been meaning to tell you about that," Tom said, lounging back in his seat

"You took my food."

"What are friends for?" Tom grinned, looking supremely unconcerned at the murderous look on the spy's face.

James returned in time to see Alex lunge for his best friend.

.

**REVIEW!**


	29. The One Where Spy Training Pays Off

**Title** – The One Where Spy Training Pays Off

**Summary** – Good friends will shout at the person who hurt you. Best friends will knock them out and bring you back a couple of their teeth as souvenirs...(apparently, James Hale is here to stay)

.

"What the hell is your problem?" James shouted, standing protectively in front of Tom.

"He walked into me," the bully, Bob, growled.

"So you punched him?"

"What's going on?"

The crowd parted to reveal Alex Rider, whose expression turned ugly upon seeing his best friend cradling a bloodied jaw.

He stalked towards Bob, who was stupid enough to hold his ground.

"Aww, little Rider; what'ya gonna –"

Bob's head snapped sideways as Alex's fist connected. The crowd gasped as Bob collapsed after a single blow, a couple of teeth coming loose. Alex tossed one to Tom.

"Happy birthday."

"Awwww, thanks."

.

**Please REVIEW!**


	30. How Glamorous

**Title**: How glamorous

**Summary**: Just because _some_ people think that the spying business is so action-packed and glamorous, doesn't make it so...

.

It was wet.

Cold.

People were giving him strange looks.

Well, Alex was sitting here, in the rain, in a _tux_, on the steps outside the house of their target. The girl he was supposed to woo.

He was certain that she wouldn't fall for any of his tricks. For Christ's sake, she was nine bloody years older than him!

But really, their only other choice was Eagle. And we all know how well that would turn out.

So he waited. Soaking wet. In the rain. In his tux.

How on _earth_ did people get the impression spying was glamorous?

.

**Please REVIEW!**

Trivia: This actually came from a painting someone had just put up in the hallway. In it, there's a guy in a tux, sitting on the stairs in the rain. The guy had long, shaggy blonde hair that for some reason made me think immediately of Alex. Just so you know ;)


	31. Change

**Title**: Change

**Summary**: If there was one thing in your life you could change, what would it be?

_._

_If there was one thing in your life you could change, what would it be?_

Those words stared up at Alex, taunting. Around him, his classmates were already busy writing. Heck, even _Tom_ looked like he was answering the question.

But all Alex could draw up was a blank.

_I would quit MI6_. Yeah, like that would ever happen.

_I wouldn't be a spy_. True. He wouldn't. But that would mean he would no longer be Alex Rider. He wouldn't have known Jack. Tom.

In the end, he settled with a simple '_nothing'_.

Because really, what else could he say?

.

_Hm, strange one...oh well._

**Please leave a REVIEW!**


	32. A Drunken Reprise

**Title** – A drunken reprise

**Summary** – Alex; you really should've learnt your lesson the first time. Then maybe Jack's chocolate birthday cake wouldn't be completely destroyed...

**Double Prompt Hit! "**chocolate cake (i'm hungry)" –** ReillyScarecrowRocks **_and "_Whiskey" - **speechbubble**

.

"You didn't..."

"I did."

"Oh Alex, I thought you learnt your lesson last time!" Jack cried, wringing her hands.

Alex sighed, covering his face with his hands. "I thought so too," he said, his voice coming out muffled, "But apparently not."

Jack groaned. "What are we going to do? What am _I_ going to do?"

"I honestly have no clue," Alex's voice was laced with despair, "But you have to do_ something_!"

At that moment, the source of their troubles staggered into the room. Covered head to toe in chocolate cake.

"Wha 'sup!" Tom slurred, before passing out once more.

.

_Hehehe...yeah, I'm having fun messing with them. Probably too much fun...hope Tom doesn't get liver damage from all the drinking he's doing..._

**REVIEW!**


	33. The One with the Detention

**Title** – The One with the Detention

**Summary** – A good friend will bail you out of detention. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

.

"_Baby you're a firework!_"

Alex groaned, slamming his head into the table. Even through the closed door, Tom's voice could still be heard from where he was serving time in the next room.

"_This is meant to be a detention, Mr Harris!_" Came the swift reprimand.

Alex suddenly wished that James had tried just that little bit harder to get them out of it.

The only consolation was that Bob was also experiencing the torture that was Tom's 'singing'. Stupid git should never have punched Alex's friend. Though why Tom was in detention...

"_Make 'em go oh –_"

"_MR HARRIS!_"

.

Hehehe. Oh, what will those boys get up to next?

**PLEASE REVIEW!**


	34. Broken

**Title**: Broken

**Summary**: Just because someone looks tough on the outside, doesn't mean that they're tough inside. They just didn't want to add to the already plentiful worries of the world.

Warning, this is kinda depressing...

.

The first thing he noticed was the blood. Dripping down the wall. Splattered across the pristine white paint.

Then, the writing underneath.

_Loner._

_Useless._

_Waste of air._

_Good for nothing._

_Worthless._

The words were repeated, hundreds, thousands, even millions of times, across the wall. Cramped in the corners. Huge and accusing in the center.

Outside, the sobbing had yet to cease.

Inside, the heavy silence was almost tangible.

All eyes were focused in horror at the wall.

No-one wanted to see the body lying in the corner. Broken.

_One push is all you need, to break even the toughest mind._

.

I'm going to leave it very ambiguous; you can decide for yourself who is who ;)

**Please leave a REVIEW!**


	35. The One with the Fall

**Title** – The One with the Fall

**Summary** – There are days when Tom is the best friend Alex could ever ask for. Then there are all those other days...

.

"Ooof!"

"Woah – you alright mate?"

Alex grinned weakly. "Just peachy."

"Here," James said, reaching out a hand. Alex took it with a grateful smile.

The hadn't gone more than three steps when Alex lurched forwards rather violently, before hitting the ground.

"Son of a –!" He hissed, grabbing his shin. "Tom, _what the hell?_"

However, Tom Harris was in no position to answer. He, like his best friend was on the ground. Unlike Alex, who was grimacing in pain as he massaged his abused leg, Tom was rolling around in fits of laughter.

"Oh – oh – you should've seen your face!"

.

Have I ever mentioned how much I love Tom?

**REVIEW!**


	36. A Drinking Game Gone Wrong

**Title** – Drinking Game Gone Wrong

**Summary** – For most people, it was normal to get drunk and become complete idiots. However, there's always a time and a place for everything, and the bank wasn't the time nor the place...ever.

**Prompt** – "_Alex drunk at MI6 headquarters_" – Aestiva (this is the best I could come up with...hope you like it!)

**Tumblr!** – I've got a tumblr! Check it out (just remove the spaces):

chariots99 . tumblr . com

.

In retrospect, it had been a really bad idea. But at the time...

'Blunt! Dude!' Alex slurred, interrupting Mr Blunt in the middle of an important-looking meeting. 'You _rock_!'

Blunt blinked at him, while everyone else stared with slacken jaws. Those jaws hit the ground a second later when Tom staggered into the office in fits of drunken laughter.

'Hey, Alex!' he giggled. I just stole Mrs Jones's mints!'

Alex hiccoughed. 'Awesome – oh man, let's go poke Crawley!'

The two staggered back out, and all eyes turned to the grimacing Blunt.

'That was Agent Rider ... our nation's best spy.'

.

_Tom's been a really bad influence!_

_**Please**__** REVIEW!**__ And feel free to leave prompts too!_

_Love Chariots99_


	37. Bros before Hoes

**Title** – Bros before Hoes

**Summary –** "Bros before Hoes". The golden rule, one which must be followed. Unless, of course, the particular "hoe" in question is an assassin...

**Prompt** – "_Anything on: ''Bro's before Ho's?''_" – alicelouise'x (enjoy! Not sure if it was what you had in mind though...)

**Tumblr** – chariots99 . tumblr . com

.

'Hey Alex!' Tom greeted enthusiastically. 'So, big game tonight! My place, around seven? James and Liam are coming. You can bring the beers.'

'Sorry man,' said Alex apologetically. 'As appealing as that sounds, I'm spending the night with Dianna. We're going shopping, then chilling at her place. Probably watching reruns of "Desperate Housewives" or something,' he finished with a shudder.

Tom frowned. 'You are _totally_ whipped! Come on, dude – whatever happened to "bros before hoes"?'

Alex just sighed, running a hand through his hair. 'It's not "whipped" when your girlfriend knows fifty-three ways to kill you with a paperclip.'

'...Touché.'

.

_Haha, see what I did there? *Authoress jumps around excitedly*_

_**Please REVIEW!**_

_Love Chariots99_


	38. Safe and Sound

**Title** – Safe and Sound

**Summary** – Come morning light, you and I'll be safe and sound

.

Alex swallowed heavily. Next to him sat Tom, shivering; though whether from fear or cold, Alex couldn't tell.

A heavy silence hung between them.

'I'm sorry, Tom,' Alex whispered finally.

'Why?'

'I dragged you into this.'

'I could've left, unlike you.' Tom turned to face Alex, a shaky smile on his face. 'Don't worry.'

Alex nodded, watching Tom lean back into the rocks and close his eyes. 'I'll keep watch.'

'Don't bother,' Tom said. 'It'll be over soon.'

'We'll rule the afterlife.'

'You know it.'

Come morning light, the cave was little more than a smoking hole in the ground.

.

_Yeah ... I'm going to be getting some real angry hate mail, aren't I?_


	39. Luke, I am Your Father

_Can I just say, from the bottom of my heart, thank you to all my reviewers. Seriously. I love you guys. This chapter is for you :)_

**Title –** Luke, I am Your Father

**Summary – **In which Tom bails Alex out of a sticky situation with persistent unwanted female attention via earpiece ... and has a little too much fun doing it...

.

'_Just say what I tell you to say_,' Tom had said. '_Trust me_.'

And Alex had stupidly trusted his friend, putting the earpiece in and meeting up with Lily.

'I'm so glad we're –' she began.

'_I need to tell you something.'_

'I need to tell you something,' said Alex. He waited for Tom, before speaking. 'It's – look, you're a great girl. Beautiful. Smart.'

Lily smiled.

'But you don't need to see my identification. These aren't the droids you're –' Alex broke off as clarity struck.

Turning his head away, he growled into his comm: 'Harris. You are _so_ dead.'

.

_I had a lot of fun writing this, and I hope you guys had fun reading it too!_

_**Please **__**REVIEW!**_

_Love, Chariots99_


	40. Practise

**Title** – Practise

**Summary** – It wasn't often that Alex found himself profusely thanking every deity that ever existed for giving his friend such a gift with fire...

**Prompt** – "_Tom's a pyro, right? Does anything good ever come of it?_" – firedrakegirl (hope you like it, and I hope I got your name right!)

.

'RUN!' Alex shouted, pushing Tom ahead.

Behind them roared the column of flames, a towering beast, unforgiving in hunger.

'Alex!' Tom wheezed. 'Can't –'

'_KEEP GOING_!' Alex bellowed, forcing Tom's head down to avoid flaming debris.

Blinded by smoke, they sprinted for their lives.

The drop appeared and Tom skidded to a halt.

Alex didn't.

Grabbing his friend's waist, he leaped into darkness, fire snapping at their heels. They landed with twin thuds on the dirt below.

Panting, Alex looked up to the warehouse on fire.

'Think we lost them?' Tom asked shakily.

Alex nodded. 'Thank God you've had practise.'

.

_Well, that was one adrenaline filled drabble ;)_

_**Please **__**REVIEW!**__ And feel free to send in prompts, since I'm getting back into these now!_

_Love Chariots99_


	41. SURPRISE!

**Title** – Surprise

**Summary** – Throwing surprise parties for spies was a dangerous mission ... a very dangerous mission indeed...

**Prompt** – "_Alex gets thrown a surprise birthday party_" – Another Harry potter fan (Hope you like this, you awesome reviewer!)

.

'I am _so_ sorry!' Alex winced.

Around them, standing awkwardly, were K-Unit, Jack and Ben. The living room was explosively decorated, presents scattered on the floor. Hanging above the fireplace was a sign reading "_Happy Birthday Alex!_"

It had been a surprise party. Tom's idea.

Unfortunately, neither the timing nor execution had been great. Alex had just returned from a deadly mission, and was still extremely twitchy. So, when everyone had jumped out at him in the dark screaming "SURPRISE!", he'd reflexively punched the closest person.

Which had been Tom.

'It's fine,' said Tom, still clutching at his bleeding nose.

.

_Oh, the things I put them through!_

_**Please REVIEW!**__ And feel free to leave prompts too ;)_

_Love Chariots99_


	42. Double-Oh-Never

Well, it's certainly been a while, hasn't it?

To the guest reviewer who asked why these aren't longer - I'm writing drabbles, which are meant to be just 100 words :)

**Title** - Double-Oh-Never-Will-Be-Hired-As-An-Agent-for-As-Long-As-Blunt-Is-Director

**Summary** - title says it all, really.

**Inspiration** - from Strawberry's review: _Tom is amazing! One of my favourite charakters I hate it when people don' t bother to write him :(( He's so cool, I mean he could probably stop an assassin only because he annoyed him/her so much :)_

.

'Alex was targeted by an assassin.'

Tom nodded.

'You were held hostage in your classroom as bait.'

Another nod.

'We had teams coming for you. You knew that.'

Nod.

'You also knew that the assassin wouldn't dare harm you.'

Nod.

'So why did you _set your classroom on fire_?!' Blunt exploded. 'We would've got you out _without_ the additional risks to your life!'

'Dude, you never heard that guy's voice. Annoying as hell. Another five minutes waiting for you, and I would've killed myself!'

Beside him, Alex dropped his head into his hands with a groan.

.

Please **Review** and leave prompts!


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